"Chapter 23—Selfishness in the Church and in the Family Dear Brother M, I have been shown in vision that you have defects in your character which must be remedied. You are not right in your views and feelings in regard to your wife. You do not appreciate her. She has not received the words of sympathy and love from you that you should have given her. It would not lessen the dignity of your manhood to praise her for the care she takes and the burdens she bears in the family. 4T 255"
"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;"
The EGW passage directly addresses a husband's lack of love and appreciation for his wife, echoing the principle of Ephesians 5:25 which commands husbands to love their wives.
"You are selfish and exacting. You mark little things and talk of small errors in your wife and children. In short, you seek to gauge their consciences by your own; you try to be conscience for them. Your wife has an identity of her own, which can never be merged in that of her husband. She has an individuality which she should preserve, for she is accountable before God for herself. You cannot, Brother M, be responsible before God for the character your wife forms. She alone will bear this responsibility. God is just as willing to impress the conscience of your God-fearing wife as He is to impress your conscience for her. 4T 255.2"
"So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God."
The EGW passage emphasizes individual accountability before God, mirroring the core message of Romans 14:12.