"yourself of selfishness, and learn the mind and will of God. Study to show yourself approved unto God. You are impulsive, and are naturally irritable and peevish. You work far beyond your strength. There is no virtue in this, for God does not require it. A selfish disposition is at the bottom of this. Your motives are not praiseworthy. You shun responsibility and caretaking, and have felt that you should be favored. It is to be regretted that from your childhood you have been petted and favored, and your will left unsubdued. Now, at a more advanced age, you have the work to do which should have been done in your childhood. Your husband has yielded to your wishes and indulged your whims, to your injury. 2T 230.1"
"Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth."
The EGW passage directly quotes 2 Timothy 2:15, making this an explicit allusion.
"That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;"
Both passages discuss putting off the old self and its selfish desires. The EGW passage speaks of ridding oneself of selfishness, while Ephesians 4:22 speaks of putting off the old man. This is a thematic parallel.
"And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts."
Both passages discuss crucifying the flesh and its desires. The EGW passage speaks of ridding oneself of selfishness, while Galatians 5:24 speaks of crucifying the flesh with its affections and lusts. This is a thematic parallel.
Selfishness, which manifests itself in a variety of ways according to circumstances and the peculiar organization of individuals, must die. If you had children, and your mind were compelled to be called away from yourself to care for them, to instruct them, and be an example to them, it would be an advantage to you. You have called forth in your home the attention and forbearance which are required to be exercised toward children. This attention you require and will have. But you have not thought it any part of your duty to care for, or seek to advantage, others. You are willful and very set to carry out your own plans. When everything is smooth in your pathway, you manifest the fruits we expect to see borne by a Christian; but when your path is crossed, the result is the opposite. Like a spoiled child which deserves chastisement, you have a spell of perverse willfulness. When two compose a family, as in your case, and there are no children to call into exercise patience, forbearance, …
"Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me."
Both passages discuss self-denial. The EGW passage speaks of selfishness needing to die, while Matthew 16:24 speaks of denying oneself. This is a clear thematic parallel.